Divorce could be the last resort. But the moment it already happened, there’s no turning back. Coming up with this decision is never easy. There’s a lot for you to take in and consider even before the separation happens. Another thing is, coping post-divorce may be different for each party. One could end up with the kids and the other one won’t.
You may be dealing with the latter situation and you should be prepared for that. Though you may think that it’d be easier if you’re not going to be with the kids, you may be wrong. Dealing with it emotionally may become a problem. Not to mention how the divorce itself can affect your daily life mentally.
On the other hand, there are still some things you can do instead to cope with living alone. Here are some tips that you can follow to prepare yourself for living by yourself post-separation:
Pack everything you need
Nothing more, nothing less. Get all the things you own and leave the ones you want to leave behind. If you think some things may just remind you of this bitter chapter of your life, leave those stuff too. They’re not going to help you with moving forward. You should also be practical with the number of things you’ll be bringing with you. That’s needed especially if you still don’t have a permanent house to move into. Just bring all the essentials.
Plan on your living space
You may be living alone but that doesn’t mean you won’t need a less livable place. One thing you can do is to live in an apartment where you can fit in all your things. This should give you ample time to think if you’re going to stay permanently in the apartment or if you’re going to buy a place of your own. If you think that renting perpetually would be the best option for you, then go for it. If buying a home is more viable, then check out the best mortgage company in your area and see if you can score a perfect house for yourself. This may also be the time to think if you should get a house that can cater to another person if ever you’d start dating again.
Manage your finances
We all know that divorce can be expensive. A report says that the average cost of divorce in the U.S. is $15,000. It’s also stated that it could be higher. With all the couples’ therapy and divorce lawyer fees you may have exhausted, this could eat up some of your savings. This is why it’s important to know your financial situation. You need to be well-informed about that even before the divorce happens.
See if you can sustain your lifestyle with your income. You can get a part-time job if you wish to earn more. That could help you save more money too. Remember that there’s no one you could share your utility bills with now because you’re on your own. Make sure that you manage your finances properly.
Think of your children’s welfare
In case you have children to support, you have to think of their well-being. If the court asked you to give your children child support, you should oblige. You should also check with them from time to time, so they’d know how much you still care for them. It’s needed especially if you want to let your children know how you feel about them. The situation may not be that good for your kids. That’s why you have to support your children, so they could deal with this difficult transition. Don’t let them suffer the consequences of divorce.
This could be the most appropriate time for you to do what you couldn’t when you were still with your spouse. There may be passions or hobbies that you’ve always wanted to pursue. You may have more time to explore those. Revisit these things that you know would satisfy you. You may have been thinking about traveling for a while. If you’ve already saved up for it, then do it. You can start seeing other people too if that’s your prerogative. Or maybe learn an instrument you’ve always wanted to play for the longest time. There may be a lot of things you’ve been meaning to do. This could be the perfect time to do them and enjoy yourself.
Living solo may be difficult at first. That’s especially if you’ve had an emotional connection with the people you left. But just like any other circumstances, you’re going to get through it. Just make sure to not forget your obligations and take care of yourself.